Battle of the Bridesmaids

Selecting your wedding party can be quite stressful. Who should you ask? Who will be offended if you don’t ask them? Are you just filling spaces or does this person play an important role in your life? I wish I could tell you the stress will be over once you choose your attendants. But I can’t, because the battle has only begun.

Picking a dress is often harder than deciding who will forever be standing beside you in your wedding pictures. Picking the dress your 9 bridesmaids will march down the aisle wearing will cause you to question your relationships and friendships throughout the wedding planning process. A laissez faire approach to dress selection has the potential to create very stressful crazy and downright hostile appointment. Little progress is made when the bridesmaids are all going different directions with little input from the bride.

If you want all of your attendants to wear the same dress without hurt feelings or worse, I offer you some tips to help you maintain your Queen of the Day status with grace and poise.

Behold, this is the dress

One way to approach of choosing a dress all your bridesmaids will wear is to simply choose it for them. Shop alone and be considerate of the body shapes, sizing and the budget of your bridesmaids. With the help of a knowledgeable bridal consultant, choose a dress which will flatter the women who have agreed to participate in your wedding. Be prepared to dish the dirt on your attendants like height, bust size and body issues to your sales consultant so she can help you select a dress. Making decisions is part of the job description of bride, so don’t be afraid to make one. You will feel less stress and so will your bridesmaids. Most bridesmaids are simply honored to be a part of your big day and will go along with whatever you choose.

My ladies, you may choose (from two)

Another great approach when it comes to choosing a dress is to give the group two pre-selected options. Again, shop alone and pick out two dresses. Ask your sales consultant to help you select complimentary dresses which will flatter the women in your wedding party but give them options. Both should be from the same designer, same fabric and same color. Take a vote and stick to the rules: majority wins. This option has a greater potential for hurt feelings and can be a logistical nightmare if you can’t get everyone together at one time to cast their vote. Step aside and let your maid or matron of honor due her official duty. This takes you out of the final decision while still giving your input.

Either way, it can be challenge to get your entire bridal party to agree on one thing: the dress. By taking control of the dress decision, you will save yourself and your bridesmaids a lot of stress and hurt feelings.

Some of the best marriage advice I ever received was “Choose your battles wisely.” Be the Queen of this battle.

With love,